Last week was a really stressful week because my grandma was admitted to the hospital on Monday. I'm not exactly sure on all the details, but she's just not doing well. She has emphysema and hasn't been eating properly. She's out of the hospital now, but she's in a rehabilitation center and we may have to put her into assisted living. Right now, well up until she was admitted to the hospital, she lived in an apartment for elderly people. But now she may have to be put into assisted living, if she is unable to live on her own. Which kind of really sucks. And I also had a CPR class.
That was interesting. Because I procrastinated for so long, I had to take the class in Waterford, which is about 40-45 minutes away. But the first night took me an hour and fifteen minutes, more or less. The second time took me about an hour. But I passed and everything so I am now certified in CPR so I can actually start the Nursing program (one of the requirements is that I be certified in CPR). So that's good. I'll be going back up to school in exactly one week. How scary is that? My classes start on August 23, which is in 10 days, actually. Wow. I'm really excited and I can't wait to get out of the house and away from my parents. They've been driving me insane. And it's been stressful because of my grandma, so I am very glad to get away.
The best news is that I have a title for the sequel to Dante's Requiem. It's kind of weird that I'm thinking about the sequel when the first one isn't even done yet, but I have a draft for each of them, so I guess it's okay. The title will be The Last Bearers. I'm really excited that I actually came up with a title. I hated the original title, Identity so I decided to come up with a new one. But nothing was coming to me. So I just waited and waited. And finally, today, I was playing Solitare and listening to music (I do that when I'm in writer's block because for whatever reason, it helps me) and the song playing was the music from the Lord of the Rings Two Towers trailer: Requiem for a Dream remix which is an epic song and the title just sort of came to me. So I'm going with it.
I've also been working on a short story that's turning out to be a bit longer than I first anticipated. It's called Only One Night. And here's a quick excerpt:
I’m not gay.
Gabriel Allen continued muttering that to himself as he hunched over his drink at a table in a crammed bar on a Friday night. It earned him several odd glances from the other patrons, who probably thought he was crazy, but he didn’t care. He probably was crazy. Otherwise, he wouldn’t have kissed Axel like that.
Gabriel pressed his fingertips to his lips at the memory and he could almost feel Axel’s lips pressed there, those warm, soft lips…
He gave a cry of disgust and lowered his hand. What the hell was he thinking? He was not gay. He had no idea why he had kissed Axel, but he wasn’t going to think about it anymore.
Gabriel drained the remnants of his drink and ordered a second, drinking it more slowly. The alcohol helped soothe his frazzled nerves. As he drank, he glanced around at the bar. He had never been in here before, though he had passed by it many times on his way back to his apartment from classes. It wasn’t anything special, just like every other bar in town. There was a bar, of course, and TVs suspended over it, broadcasting every sport imaginable. Small tables crammed the room and sports memorabilia from every century hung on the walls.
It was a fairly comfortable place where sports fans could come to watch a game, hang out with non-sports fans just there for the drinks, and have a good time. And gaze at the pretty waitresses. Gabriel quickly looked around. All the waitresses here had huge breasts, tight asses, and skimpy clothes. Speaking of slutty waitresses…
Gabriel gritted his teeth as one of them walked up to his small table in the corner, bringing with her the scent of expensive perfume that made his eyes water. Her hair was dyed red and teased into long curls that framed her face. She wore blue eye shadow and her lips were painted mahogany. She was a few years older than him, but obviously thought she could get away with flirting with him. Definitely not his type.
“Yeah?” he snapped at her.
“Can I get you anything, sugar?” the woman purred in a heavy Southern drawl.
“Another one of these, please,” Gabriel responded, holding up his beer bottle.
“Sure thing.” With a wink, the woman vanished.
Gabriel groaned under his breath and took a large gulp of his drink. The alcohol burned as it went down his throat. His eyes watered, but he took another sip. By the time the waitress came back with his third beer, the second one had been drained and sat on the edge of the table, waiting to be picked up.
“Here you are, hun. Need anything else?” the waitress said, setting the third beer on the table.
“No thank you,” Gabriel said politely.
The waitress grinned at him and took the empty bottle away. Why did she even bother flirting with him? He was obviously not into her. Sure, he was good-looking, but not that good-looking.
Gabriel had never really considered himself to be attractive. He was far too skinny and pale with a mop of unruly strawberry blonde hair and pale blue eyes. And he had never found anyone to be attractive, really. The guys were all muscle and no brains and the girls were all boobs and no brains. Not attractive at all…
He took a sip of his drink and resisted the urge to gag. He normally didn’t drink under any circumstances. In fact, he was underage, but no one in this bar needed to know that. He had an ID one of his friends had forged and he looked much older than he actually was. Luckily, no one really cared if there was underage drinking as long as it was kept in control. Gabriel never drank, but he had the ID in case of emergency, which tonight clearly was. He was extremely jittery tonight and required alcohol to soothe his nerves.
Even with the alcohol in his system, he still felt uneasy and he didn’t know why. He glanced around the bar. Everything seemed normal enough. All the patrons were laughing and chatting amongst themselves, unwinding after a long week of work or (in some cases) classes. Gabriel envied them. They could forget their troubles with a couple drinks. Not Gabriel. With every drink he consumed, his anxieties grew. Something bad was going to happen.
Gabriel blew several strands of strawberry blonde hair out of his eyes and sighed. Maybe he was being paranoid; it wouldn’t be the first time. He looked around again. Was it just him or was the atmosphere becoming more oppressive? Some of the patrons had lit cigarettes and the smoke hovered in the air, veiling the bar in a shroud of smoke. Gabriel choked slightly, claustrophobia setting in. The room seemed to be much smaller, the bodies closer. He fought off the anxiety that was building, but it was no use. He needed to get out, now. He couldn’t breathe. Oh god, he couldn’t breathe. Something was burning. Swallowing hard, Gabriel summoned the waitress.
“What can I get for you, sugar?” she asked, winking at him seductively.
“The check…please,” Gabriel responded, trying to keep his tone level.
“Oh. Okay.” The waitress looked disappointed. “Hold on a second.”
Gabriel bit back the urge to scream. “Okay.”
The waitress returned a couple minutes later with his check. He glanced at it and quickly grabbed enough money for the bill and a hefty tip for the waitress. As he rose, he stuffed his wallet back in his pocket, grabbed his coat from the back of the chair, and bristled past the other patrons for the door.
He shrugged into his coat, but he didn’t even bother zipping it up as he hurried through the frozen evening air. He felt marginally better as he stopped at a street corning, waiting for the light to change, but the anxiety remained.
“Fuck,” he muttered, rushing across the street as soon as it became safe to cross.
It felt like he was going to die. He hated that feeling so fucking much. His anxiety attacks had lessened over the years, but they were still a bitch when they came. His mind screamed at him that he needed to get as far away from the bar as possible or he was going to die.
